Member-only story

I Think We’re Scared Again

What Music Speaks, part five

Tracy Lynne Oliver
Gay Mag
4 min readJul 30, 2019

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Illustration by Louisa Bertman

MMusic is in the world with you. You’ve interacted with it, saw its face, held its arms, ran towards its heat. It’s been with you in those moments; the ones you want to remember, the ones you want to forget. Music has been your companion, your confidant. It’s been a secret keeper and a hand holder and a place where you can get lost for a while. In this short story music does all of these things and more.

I Think We’re Scared Again

TThe house is as quiet as it wants to be and it wants to be very, very quiet. It mimics the outside where the zombie apocalypse has taken place. Nothing out there but dead people and dead leaves. Everything wet and gray but shellacked with a fine, crystal finish. There’s a shine to it that reflects the sun. The silent outside makes the inside that much quieter. I am a bull inside its china shop. I stomp around in my slippers.

I cannot make breakfast in the quiet. I need something that will stir. After many phone calls they arrive. I buzz them in; singularly and in groups. I show them into the living room, kitchen, dining room and ask them to get comfortable. They begin their warm-ups. Guitars, harmonicas, and horns fill the house. I sigh, relieved there is noise.

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Gay Mag
Gay Mag

Published in Gay Mag

A new magazine from Roxane Gay offering some of the most interesting and thoughtful cultural criticism to be found on the Web. Our first quarterly is coming in June 2019. We value deep explorations, timelessness, and challenging conventional thinking without being cheap and lazy.

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